A lot of times it's really hard being a girl..one doesn't always get exposed to the true realities of many faces she sees around her!
I really don't want to make it sound sexist, and especially when masking and camouflages are such common tactics generally in society. But why it could get particularly harder figuring out the 'real truth' from the 'pretense-enforced truth'; that is because the 'girl syndrome' makes it easier for men to make absolute fools out of their...no, no, no...not innocence, but their extreme dumbness...NOTE: MEN, not guys.
Guys tend to be pretty good friends, the best ones indeed sometimes. But then again, 'friend' is such a confused and distorted word these days, just like 'lo-o-o-ve'. And it is the calrity of difference between the two words, that sets apart 'guys' from 'men'.
And it is the conflict between the two that keeps us from truly understanding in so many cases, whether another couple, or our own 'other person' is 'just a friend', or 'more than a friend'. And then, 'more than a friend' also has varying connotations.
1. friend with benefits
2. f**k buddy
3. one-night stand
4. boy/girlfriend (with feelings)
5. fiance
6. spouse
7. ex-partner
8. ex-spouse
....and yes
9. gold-digger men
10. gold-digger women
*Phew*...but anyway the point is, when 'men' mostly intend to, and know for a fact that whatever the nature of the relationship, it won't go much farther than sex, why do women still cling on to the belief, or the delusion really, that it is actually 'lo-o-ove'?! Is a regular, typical girl SO stupid so as to know the truth deep inside her head, and yet deny it in her heart?!
From what I've been seeing and still see around me, and from my personal experience, so many people out there, including men and women, most of them are just bul*sh*t*ng to each other. Trust is hard to build, and to keep, and also to give. 'Love' is a joke, a tool of manipulation that the 'men' use to hook up with the women, especially in our society, where sex is a major tabboo and polygamy is a stigma; and the ironic part is, most people indulge in it and then lie to their steady partners in order to score others.
It's not even ridiculous anymore, it's sick. And I'm not even thinking much of it anymore, I'm indifferent: the lesser devil.
But that doesn't mean we stop believing in the words 'friend' and 'love', as long as we believe in living up to our belief systems! If what we see going on around us does not agree with what we believe in, doesn't mean we stop that thinking process in our minds and join the bandwagon. The only point of contention here is that we learn to differentiate when someone is masking one thing for some hidden ulterior motives of theirs. And if you don't get what you want, don't stop struggling for it; and in the process, maybe one could substitute their love needs with something else that is self-fulfilling.
Guys tend to be pretty good friends, the best ones indeed sometimes. But then again, 'friend' is such a confused and distorted word these days, just like 'lo-o-o-ve'. And it is the calrity of difference between the two words, that sets apart 'guys' from 'men'.
And it is the conflict between the two that keeps us from truly understanding in so many cases, whether another couple, or our own 'other person' is 'just a friend', or 'more than a friend'. And then, 'more than a friend' also has varying connotations.
1. friend with benefits
2. f**k buddy
3. one-night stand
4. boy/girlfriend (with feelings)
5. fiance
6. spouse
7. ex-partner
8. ex-spouse
....and yes
9. gold-digger men
10. gold-digger women
*Phew*...but anyway the point is, when 'men' mostly intend to, and know for a fact that whatever the nature of the relationship, it won't go much farther than sex, why do women still cling on to the belief, or the delusion really, that it is actually 'lo-o-ove'?! Is a regular, typical girl SO stupid so as to know the truth deep inside her head, and yet deny it in her heart?!
From what I've been seeing and still see around me, and from my personal experience, so many people out there, including men and women, most of them are just bul*sh*t*ng to each other. Trust is hard to build, and to keep, and also to give. 'Love' is a joke, a tool of manipulation that the 'men' use to hook up with the women, especially in our society, where sex is a major tabboo and polygamy is a stigma; and the ironic part is, most people indulge in it and then lie to their steady partners in order to score others.
It's not even ridiculous anymore, it's sick. And I'm not even thinking much of it anymore, I'm indifferent: the lesser devil.
You make a very important point about girls deluding themselves over dishonest lovers when it is very clear that the "men" are after one thing only. Sartre calls it "bad faith" when a person lies to her/himself. what do you think it signifies? are girls in such a desperate state of affairs that they can't make that differentiation? why so? or have they lost faith in building relationships on true grounds? or is it a manifestation of the compromising role that our society assigns to women which then the women themselves start believing in? what purpose does this "bad faith" (to use Sartre's term) serve for them?
ReplyDeleteI think it's more about the social obligation on the females to conform to their roles as faithful partners/wives to their men, and to overlook their drawbacks, even if they are consciously aware of that. Though this kind of passive behavior or 'bad faith' in turn also leads to the vicious cycle of promotion of such behaviors for their male counterparts. Due to this state of affairs, confusing the concept of love with that of sacrifice and playing the 'martyr role' (psychological theory), they tend to ignore and at least apparently accept if the man does such injustice to them.
ReplyDeleteThis by no means implies that women themselves are completely fair and honest. But particularly in our society, it's a very undercover business, and also a much lesser common practice than among men, which also relates to the stereotypical female role determined for, and reinforced in them by society.